Rona's Wedding Thoughts

Thoughts on the institution of marriage, the insanity of the wedding industry, the small joys and large annoyances of wedding planning, and the pulse of love that's at the heart of why I'm doing this.

Saturday, July 5, 2008

My Fantasy Career: Alternative Wedding Planner!

I've referred to the gay marriage phenomenon happening currently in California a few times before, and I've realized that this historic moment opens up a whole new sector for the 'bridal' industry (hmm, that name may have to change soon...): gay wedding planning.

I'd already been thinking during the last few months that when I shift over to consulting full-time (sometime in the next couple years after I leave my current job), I'd like to add wedding planning and coordination to the list of services I could provide. I already do fundraising training and consulting, and have done some event planning as both a consultant and a nonprofit staffer. I really like planning events (uh, duh, I started a whole new blog that's basically about my wedding planning!) and I've heard from other folks that I'm pretty good at it. I like dealing with details, figuring out creative solutions to unique problems, and observing and learning about different people's visions and values around special days like weddings, birthdays, anniversaries, etc.

Plus, being the progressive, pro-queer feminist that I really think that the whole gay marriage tidal wave is going to change the institution of marriage. Not in the whole 'man and woman' way, but on a more substantial and systemic level. No doubt, many gay people want to get married because of the institutional (and some say, including I, elitist and pro-capitalist) benefits that marriage provides: protection for your assets, the ability to pass on inherited wealth (aka being able to keep the profits you or your family may have earned by exploiting other people in your family with limited taxation), the formal recognition of your relationship as valid, etc. But at the same time, gay relationships--having had to be radical on many levels the way straight relationships don't have to be--are often inherently subversive, and gay people tend to take pride in that. From gender-bending (who's the Mrs. and the Mr. in a marriage between two men, or two women? or between transgendered people? who's the 'top' and who's the 'bottom' are sometimes more relevant terms to queer folks) and screwing with mainstream society's view of what a 'real man' or 'real woman' should be like, to breaking the serial-monogamy rules and having open or 'complicated' relationships, to accepting sexuality in a full-frontal, often healthier way than straight society deems acceptable, the gay community and therefore gay relationships have the potential to rattle the institution of marriage to its very core.

And I think that's a very, very good thing--not to mention it'll be lots of fun to watch unfold! And what better place to be part of all the brouhaha and excitement than by being a same-sex wedding planner? I'd also, of course, want to be eco-conscious and offer a whole menu of green wedding options. I'm totally serious, people, I want to help gay people have fabulous, enviromentally friendly, well-planned and beautifully executed weddings!

So if you're a gay or lesbian or tranny or whatever couple and you need some help with all the myriad details that having a spectacular nuptial ceremony brings, gimme a holler. I'd love to help you make your wedding dreams come true.

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2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello! I'm so excited to link to a progressive pro-queer feminist's wedding site! Hello Hello Hello!

July 6, 2008 at 2:38 PM  
Blogger Rona Fernandez said...

Thanks for linking! Look forward to reading more of your blog too.

July 6, 2008 at 3:12 PM  

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