Rona's Wedding Thoughts

Thoughts on the institution of marriage, the insanity of the wedding industry, the small joys and large annoyances of wedding planning, and the pulse of love that's at the heart of why I'm doing this.

Monday, November 26, 2007

First Day of Dresses

So I've decided to start this blog to hold all (or at least some) of my thoughts, musings, ramblings, rants and obsessions about my pending nuptials (yes, that's what a wedding is, nuptials! Sounds like a small animal or something). I've written a little bit about my ambivalence about traditional marriages on my other blog, but since I've plunged head-long into the wedding planning process, I find I need a place, a container for all these thoughts milling about my head. And yes, I've started having anxiety dreams about the wedding already, so you can say this is also part of my therapeutic process of purging as much of this gunk from my system so that I can concentrate on other things and get more restful sleep at night.

So yesterday was my first day of trying on wedding dresses. What a trip. I went with my friend A. to David's Bridal, a discount wedding gown store that tries (as many wedding vendors do especially the more mainstream ones that appeal to everyday folks with smallish wedding budgets, like me) to be a one-stop shopping destination for all your wedding needs. They had a giveaway going on for cookware (don't all newlyweds need midrange cookware?), sell those ugly garter belts and of course, the veils and dresses.

My 'bridal consultant' (aka saleswoman) was a Pinay as well, with that elegantly accented English that Pinoys often use--with carefully pronounced vowels and 'P's and 'B's, etc. We chatted a bit about where we were from in the Philippines, etc. etc. and then she helped me zip up the fluffy gowns that I tried on. All MUCH too fluffy for me, but it was good to find out what looks good on me (empire waist gowns, not so much, to my surprise) and what I just don't want (No tulle! who the hell wants to relive ballet recitals at your wedding?).

The strangest moment came when she asked if I was going to wear a veil. I felt strangely guilty, as if the fact that she was Filipino made me feel ashamed to say I wasn't going to wear one. So as I stammered, 'Uh, n-n-no," my bridal consultant primly took a tiara and gently placed it on my head. My friend came back at this point and said, "I thought you weren't going to wear a veil," and I felt ridiculous. Then the saleswoman put an ivory colored veil on my head with cord trim (if I were going to wear a veil, it would be something like that one, quite simple and plain), and the image in the mirror before me was complete: I was a little brown bride statue to be placed on top of a wedding cake.

I'm really glad I brought A. with me; she's into wedding planning stuff but not so girly that she took the whole thing too seriously. She was positive but honest with her feedback, and we also ended up eating In-N-Out burger across the street. I don't think I'll be going back to David's Bridal anytime soon--I can't fathom paying $400 for a polyester wedding dress when I can get a silk one on eBay for less than $200--but it was an interesting experience. One of many interesting experiences to come as we count down to our wedding day.