Narrowing it Down

I've got my eye on two dresses for the wedding ceremony (I'm planning to change into a different, more danceable, cocktail-party style dress for the reception), both of which are from Siri, a fabulous San Francisco-based woman designer whose dresses are both simple and elegant. After getting bleary-eyed from staring at all the awful images of beaded, Cinderella-at-the-ball, poufy taffeta and lace gowns on the Internet, it was so refreshing to go try on Siri's dresses at The Wedding Party in Berkeley. I just got back from my second trip there, this time with M., who also tried on a few frocks, and I'm happy to say that I'm starting to get clear on what I want my dress to look and feel like. But because H. is being strangely old-fashioned (although I'm not complaining about it) and doesn't want to see my dress before the wedding, I'm not going to post any images here. Suffice it to say that my top choices make me look smashing if I do say so myself, aren't too froofy, over-the-top feminine, and are not very expensive (as bridal dresses go anyway).

This bridal salon is perfect for someone like me. Clara, the woman who helped us, is efficient, focused, sincere and enthusiastic about the whole process. I get the sense that she thoroughly enjoys her job. I couldn't believe how much information she had in her brain about the wedding dresses they carry. And she knows how to give compliments without being overly gushy or cloying. That means a lot. One thing I've realized in the process of planning our wedding is that I really HATE it when vendors act like they're more happy about our wedding than we are, or say silly pseudo-romantic things as if we really want to hear them. We've tended to 'vibe' the vendors that we're dealing with--from the venue reps to the photographer to the people selling us our clothes--and I have definitely leaned towards wanting to work with the people that are more real and less likely to ask stupid questions like, 'So tell me how he proposed?' Sometimes it feels insulting to my intelligence how gushy these folks can be. Like the photographer who emailed us after our meeting and said, 'You two are ADORABLE together!' I was like, 'Come on!'

I bet we're lucky being in the Bay Area because there are probably more cool, 'alternative' type wedding vendors out here than in lots of other parts of the world. At least I like to think so. It's relatively easy to find people who are cool with non-traditional weddings, thanks to the whole gay-marriage craze of the last few years, and the relatively high number of radical activists, hippies and former hippies and other non-mainstream people in the Bay. And that's cool.

So wish me luck. If I want to buy my dress from The Wedding Party, I need to place my order in April. Yikes! That's not that far away. I'm excited about it but a little nervous. Each big purchase makes the whole thing just that much more real.